July 12, 2008
ooh and just so everyone knows, that is the editors email address, not the author of the articles!
July 10, 2008
When sponsors radio station Indie 103.1 and Virgin Megastore said the concert will would start at 6 p.m., they meant it.
Equipped with two of the most bizarre back-up dancers dressed in black and white, and a DJ, the electro-hipster made her way to stage in a baggy neon yellow shirt, checkered pants, and sunglasses. She threw up her arms, and got down to business in her first Los Angeles performance since the release.
Thirty-two-year-old Santogold , aka Santi White, began her set with "You'll Find A Way," which paved the way for her striking 40-minute set. Next she effortlessly belted out her single "L.E.S Artistes" flawlessly. With bold and astonishing vocals, Santo gave tourists more then there ideal concert performance.
White then followed a more mature tone with "Unstoppable," "Shove It" and "Anne," all different vocal and music styles, yet all stellar and unpredictable. She then asked fans to dance to the upbeat "Say Aha," before toning it down with "Starstruck." Santi ended it big with fan favorite "Creator."
Santogold was free, energetic and nothing short of brilliant; while the abstract dancers stayed in character with their subtle, odd, simple, yet powerful choreography. Songs like "You'll Find A Way," "L.E.S. Artistes," "Shove It," and "Creator" showcase the diverse and strong 80s flair thatshe showcases.
White, a Brooklyn native, started as a A&R representative for Sony and Epic Records, turned songwriter and producer, then turned singer. Her double-major in music and African-American studies is clearly the reason for the depth in her songs, both in the lyrics and the layers in the music itself.
Acclaim from today's most respectable music magazines (Rolling Stone, Spin) created the platform needed for Santogold to separate herself form the typical crowd and shine.
For Santogold the future is now. She will tour with Coldplay this summer and fall for most of their North American tour dates. Her songs are even being played in nightclubs in Afghanistan and Beirut. Santogold is hope for pop music. She truly is unstoppable, and her future is golden.
July 7, 2008
The Jonas Brothers went from slot-fillers, to locking all six of their hands together as one and selling out amphitheatres all by themselves. Which proves, if you open up for a Disney superstar, you will eventually become one, and I'm not ready to accept that.
Here is the deal, frankly I don't believe the Jonas Brothers are actually who they say they are. Though they all claim to be blood brothers, I just don't see the resemblance. Not only do I not I believe that they are related, I don't even think that they are the same nationality.
My theory is the boys currently play three brothers named Joe, Nick, and Kevin in Disney and Pixar's "The Jonas Brothers," as a catchy gimmick for album sales and television ratings. Isn't that just adorable?
So, who are these Jonas Brothers, and why should you care? They're three badass chicks who pull off Jr. Miss. sample sizes, while they steal the premature complex hearts of little boys and girls across America, all while staying sexually pure. That's how I'd like to raise my daughters. Somebody give them an Alma! You should care because they are the closest thing to a modern day version of Beatles we have had in years. You should also keep an eye out incase that may be your 14-year-old girl standing in line with her woo-ha on the market.
The self-proclaimed brothers wear purity rings, cross and all. To tell you the truth I don't want to know what part of their body they feel it's fashionable to wear these rings on, but I wouldn't put anything past them. Don't you dare look at me, they started it first! That's just the way they roll!
The Jonas Brothers, like so many transvestite hookers, migrated from Wyckoff, New Jersey where they attended "East Christian High School." The band started as a solo project for that ambitious little drummer boy/Broadway diva (Sound of Music, A Christmas Carol, Beauty and the Beast). I bet Nick Jonaowski didn't quite fit in that school.
The J-brew released two Christian albums titled "Dear God," and "A Christmas Prayer." That's just awkward. What's astonishing is that the now infamous "When You Look Me In The Eyes," was released when Nick was only six years of age!
Labels dug the M.O., but weren't feeling the religious angle he had. It only took a year for Jonas to drop the gimmick, and for his father to sell his sons as a three piece set of luggage to Sony records and their debut album "It's About Time," was erected.
The fems perception of themselves are hilarious. Kevin is the self proclaimed "cute romantic one." Yeah, with down syndrome-like features and diabetes. Kevin actually resembles a Korean Buddhist monk with a fashion sense that can only be described as western shang-high couture above the ankles and plain foul below the ankles. Why doesn't he buy his shoes in America like the rest of us? I love chocolate, I can have some, but it may kill him.
Joe is the "the cute funny one," who is not afraid of colors. He looks like a flamboyant version of Project Runway winner Christian Siriano. Ouch! Snap, snap, snap.
Who can forget Nick, "the cute sensitive one." I'm not going to lie, I think he's blind, constipated, and has a lifetime full of intimacy issues in front of him. Look me in the eyes! He should be the face of Pepto Bismo. He's also the only one with vocal talent in this band.
Speaking of handicaps, the fourth "brother," Frankie "bonus" Jonas is a licensed autistic for sure. Quote me. If there is a syndrome in this world, that McNugget's got it. Buy some Pepto, then YouTube Frankie Jonas. Trust me, you will need it, and you are welcome.
During their free time, The Jo-bro's like to make visits to the White House to visit mentor la presidente Bush. I thought girly men said "no" to Bush!? You know what they say, one bush at a time. I think we are making progress!
However, it was not as uncomfortable as the sudden and unexpected close up of baby brother Nick Jonas's lady bits. I think they were mad at each other because Joe played a serious case of hide the hair straighter from the rest of the girls! It was a severe case of epidermal S.O.S!
There is no doubt that this threesome is the biggest boy band on this planet, but I think that's because they are the only boy band on this planet! Ellen Page, I'm telling you, put that damned band together, it will be golden!
The aftermath of this colossal "Jonas invasion" is due to their self-titled album, , a two-year tour contract with Live Nation (creating similar ticket buzz as Cyrus), Disney movie "Camp Rock" (which ratings were so impressive on it's June 20 premiere, that the sequel it already in the works), and upcoming 3-D Flix and reality show titled J.O.N.A.S. If you're sick of them now, just wait, these boys are just getting started, their new album will be out this month!
I will leave you with a quote from Momma Jonas herself, "We're not raising boys, we're raising men." Yes, men. Men who like men, like Beyonce! Congratulations Disney, your fruit cake is delicious! Goodnight and goodbye!
It sure as hell brightens up my day!
June 24, 2008
He is always on the phone saying things like, "Hola hola, bien, bien, Corolla," which I assume translates to "Is the cocaine here? Yes, it got here 10 minutes ago. It's Colombian. They are in bricks and I put them in the Corolla." I don't trust him, or maybe I don't trust my Spanish. Maybe hola means hello…and not ... OMG, maybe he really is the parking lot monitor, I should look in to that.
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Raven Jake said:
You should check these out. Nothing like a manufactured scandal to sell magazines and newspapers Washington Post Blog Vanity Fair read more
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